Cookies, Dumplings, and Everything Nice
by psychoticauthor
Summary: Yuki has been living her life as a single mom to Ruki. She is now working as a helper on a daycare and is living her daily life quite happily with her new found friends. For Yuki, her daughter doesn't need to know who her father is. But Toru thinks other wise and he plans on bringing back his wife and his daughter back in his life. (Continuation of BURNT COOKIES)
1. Prologue

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p style="max-height: 999999px;""How old is she?"/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"The little boy who was just a minute ago busy bickering with his twin sister was now beside Yuki while she was fixing the blanket that was covering her daughter who was sleeping soundly at the futon. After she had fixed the blanket of her daughter, she then turned her attention to the little boy, gave him a small smile, and gently ruffled his wavy blond hair. "She's turning one. How about you, Aoi?"/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"The boy beamed at her and proudly patted his chest. "I am a big boy now! Aoi is five!" He shouted with his small voice but regretted it when he saw the baby stirred a little. "Sorry," he murmured while he looked at Yuki first, and then at the sleeping figure of the baby./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"Yuki laughed quietly, "Don't worry, Aoi. Maybe Ruki is just a dreaming about something."/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"The boy's eyes sparkled with curiosity and he squatted beside Yuki and leaned closer to study the face her baby. "What is she dreaming about?"/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""Uh…" Yuki smiled at him not really knowing what answer to give. "Well, maybe about a time when she is all grown up and playing with you and Akane?" In her mind, she thought how adorable little kids were for being curious about lots of things./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"Aoi looked unconvinced. He leaned his face a little closer to Ruki's and gently touched her pinkish nose. He retreated his finger and smiled happily at Yuki, "Maybe she is dreaming of her papa?"/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"Yuki's smile turned into a frown. She tried her best to avoid the joyous gaze that Aoi had been sending her way. But looking at how happy the little boy was with the thought of Ruki dreaming about her papa, Yuki decided not to say anything concerning the matter. She subtly changed the topic of the conversation. "Let us let baby Ruki get some nap, okay? Why don't you play with your sister and your friends, ne Aoi?" Yuki took his little hand on her own and guided him out of the nap room./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""Aoi and Akane do not have a mama," the boy said while his eyes were fixated on the floor. "But, we have a Papa. And grandma, and grandpa, and Se-tan, and Shiharu-tan!" He cheerfully exclaimed while he looked away from the floor and looked into Yuki's eyes./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"She giggled because the little boy looked so happy. "That is good to hear, Aoi! And you know what? Your mama is always watching you and your sister." Yuki said in a sweet-reassuring tone./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""She does?"/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""Yes!" Yuki replied while she gently squeezed his small hand. "From the heavens."/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"It seemed that he was about to say something when they both heard loud footsteps headed towards their direction. "Aoi!" Screamed the little girl whose blond hair was on a bun, she looked awfully a lot like Aoi. "Where have you been?" She pouted as soon as she halted in front of Aoi and Yuki./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""Nap room," her brother answered. The boy let go of Yuki's hand and grabbed his sister's, "Let's go to play room! Bye bye, Teacher Yuki!" He waved as he pulled the girl into the room just a few steps away./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"Yuki waved the two kids goodbye and laughed as she heard the little girl protested at her brother to stop pulling her. She watched as the two entered the play room with the other kids greeting them and asking them to play with them. Yuki smiled as she saw the twins settled into playing Lego with the other kids. She turned her back away from the playroom and went to the kitchen of the daycare./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"In her head, continuously echoed what Aoi asked her./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"em"Maybe she's dreaming of her papa?"/em/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""I hope not," she murmured to herself. "Ruki doesn't need Toru in her life."/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"-/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"A black car stopped in front of the park near the daycare, and a man wearing a white sleeve rolled up to his elbow and a black pants got out of the car. The said man studied the surroundings for a few seconds and then he started walking off towards the direction of the daycare./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""It must be around here…" he turned his head left and right to look for someone whom he could ask for directions. He luckily saw a high school student with long brown hair carrying bags of groceries heading towards what he thought was his destination. He hurriedly ran after her, tapped her shoulder while saying 'excuse me'./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""Uhm, good afternoon. I'm not someone suspicious…" he smiled awkwardly. "I just want to ask where the Sunflower House is?" He asked while he scratched the back of his head, a small red appeared on his cheeks./p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"The girl smiled kindly at him and bowed 'good afternoon' to him. "I'm headed that way, Sir. If you don't mind you can follow me."/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;"The guy's heart fluttered in happiness. "Yes, yes, please. Thank you!" He bowed in gratitude. "Oh, my name's Toru Ishikawa and I work at an IT company. Just so you don't get scared or anything!"/p  
p style="max-height: 999999px;""Nothing of the sort, Ishikawa-san!" She smiled and continued to walk towards the orphanage, Toru followed suit, he even offered to carry the grocery bags. "Oh, and I am Shiharu Nakamura."/p  
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	2. Orange Juice

The bags of groceries Toru were holding rustled under his hold as he took off his shoes. He murmured a small 'thanks for having me' as he followed the girl named Shiharu inside the orphanage-slash-daycare called 'Sunflower House'. As the girl turned a corner and he heard the opening of a door, Toru heard loud chattering of what sounded like small children.

Toru felt a pang in his heart.

"Ishikawa-san, please wait here for a moment. I'll call the head mistress," Shiharu bowed and took the groceries from him. "Oh, please sit anywhere you like. If you want, you can play with the children too," she smiled as little toddlers of ages three to five hid behind her with their curious gazes fixated on him.

"Thanks," he managed to say before he sat himself on a small chair near the bookshelf.

A little girl stood in front of him and looked at him with a huge grin on her face. "What is your name, Mister?" She chimed.

The girl's smile melted Toru's heart. _I wonder how my baby –_

"Mister?" The little girl was looking at him with her head tilted on the side. "What is your name?" She repeated.

Toru smiled. "I am Ishikawa Toru," he offered her his hand and she took it with both of hers – she laughed.

"My name is Matsunaga Akane," she shook their hands together excitedly. After she let go of Toru's hand, the little girl proceeded into introducing all of her friends who were either busy playing with each other or too cautious of Toru to greet him back. A little boy who looked just like Akane, Toru remembered his name to be 'Aoi', grabbed her sister's hand and told her to stop telling a stranger their names.

"But… Shiharu-tan is friends with him?" Akane pointed at Toru. "So, he is not a stranger, right?" She pouted at her twin.

The little boy seemed to be considering what his sister said with the way his brows furrowed while looking at Toru. He sighed in the end, "You're right. But don't get too close, okay?" Aoi whispered the last part to Akane but Toru still heard it.

Toru smiled and thought, _how cute._

"Don't worry, Aoi. I am not a bad guy," Toru smiled warmly at Aoi as he also offered his hand to the little boy for a handshake.

Aoi took it and shook it. "I know… because you look like Ruki," he murmured as he went back into playing Lego with the other kids.

 _Ruki?_

"Ishikawa-san?"

Toru stood from where he was sitting when he saw an old lady approached him. "Yes, that is me," Toru bowed politely and offered his hand to the lady whom he guessed to be the head mistress of the house. "Nice to meet you, Ma'am!"

The lady smiled at him and shook his hand. "I am the head mistress of Sunflower House. You can just call me Fujioka."

"Fujioka-san," he nodded.

"Let us talk in my office, shall we?" She offered as she guided the way.

 _This house felt warm and comfortable,_ Toru thought as he let his eyes roamed around. He could still hear the laughter of little children as even though they already left the play room.

He also heard voices of teenage guys and when he listened intently they seemed to be bickering. "You have older kids here, Fujioka-san?"

"Yes, we do. You see, we're not just a daycare but also an orphanage. This facility takes in kids who don't have family members anymore and we raise them until they reach the legal age," she turned to Toru and smiled.

A smile like that of a mother.

 _Would Yuki be smiling like that?_

When they were about to reach the end of the hall and to what seemed to be the office of Fujioka-san, Toru caught a glimpse of the kitchen. The door was slightly opened and it revealed the face of (probably) one of the workers.

 _Her face…_

He walked inside the office of the head mistress and was about to close the door when he heard the person, who was in the kitchen, laughed.

 _Yuki?_

Yuki took the bag of groceries from Shiharu and offered her some cold tea. "You must be tired, Shiharu-chan. You just got out of school but you needed to go back to town to do the grocery shopping," she smiled as she pulled a carton of eggs from the bag and put it on top of the fridge.

She heard Shiharu laughed and the clanking of the glass as the girl put her tea down on the sink. "Not at all, Yuki-san. I'm used to it, and in fact I enjoy doing things for the orphanage!"

"You really are optimistic," Yuki giggled as she finished putting in their places the groceries. "You're so cute, Shiharu-chan!"

"No, no! You are cute, Yuki-san!" Shiharu blushed from the compliment.

Yuki did not expect to be complimented – she did not expect to be called cute! "No! You are!"

"You are!"

"I'm too old to be called cute, Shiharu-chan. So please!"

"Eh? How old are you again, Yuki-san?" Shiharu teased Yuki.

"Yah! Do not ask a woman's age!"

Shiharu laughed at Yuki's outburst. Yuki laughed too, how silly of her to be arguing with an eighteen years old girl!

 _I loved this place. I did not feel alone even a bit since I came here_.

"O right! I should offer the visitor some juice!" Shiharu stopped laughing and clumsily took a glass from the drawer, she almost dropped it on the process. "That was close!"

"Calm down, Shiharu-chan," Yuki offered to pour orange juice in the glass Shiharu was holding. "We have a visitor?"

"Yeah," Shiharu took the glass of orange juice from Yuki's hand and placed it on a tray. "I was on my way home when he tapped me and asked if I know where the house was. I offered to guide him since I was headed here myself." She lifted the tray that contained a glass of orange juice and a basket of cookies.

Shiharu was on her way out and towards the head mistress' office when she remembered, "Oh! If you're worried if he's bad, he looks kind to me. To be honest, he looks like Ruki, your baby."

Yuki's heart thumped.

"What was his name again?"

The beating was getting faster and louder.

"Oh, right! Ishikawa Toru!"

* * *

 _HELLO~ This is psychoticauthor ~ SO this is the second chapter, I'm so sorry it's too short! I just lost all my files so I need to rewrite from scratch every fanfics I was writing huhuhuhu T^T Please bear with the slow progression... I really really am into slow romance you see? Please do not forget to give me some comments and opinions, k? Love lots HORIMIYA FANDOM!_

 _Disclaimer: really I do not own anything here aside from my imagination going haywire_


	3. Glass of Water

"Oh, right! Ishikawa Toru!"

When Shiharu uttered the name of the man Yuki did not want to have any connection with anymore, the world seemed to have stopped for her. Yuki's hands trembled in anger, fear, regret, joy, longing, in all the emotions that she did not want to feel anymore but slowly dawned on her because of that one name. It took all of her strength to keep standing on her feet while Shiharu closed the door of the kitchen, but when she was already left all alone, she dropped on her knees and wrapped her arms around her body in her attempt to calm herself down. Tears started to well up on her eyes as memories of _that night_ came flashing back in her head.

 _Their backs…_

 _Their hands…_

 _The moment they entered the hotel together…_

" _Toru!"_

Yuki remembered how hard she tried to gasp for air _that night_. She remembered how she shouted his name with her last intake of breath before everything went blank for her. She could not breathe back then. She could not breathe _now_. She gasped for air. She gasped a prayer – _a prayer that asked for God to make this day a joke._ Yuki heard herself sobbing really hard. She sobbed, gasped, sobbed, gasped, this was on repeat until she heard herself hiccupped. She slapped her lips and kept her hands there in her vain attempt to stop the sounds of helplessness from escaping her system.

The door suddenly sild open with a thud and life almost flew out of Yuki when she thought that the person who opened the door was the very person she did not want to see.

"What are you –"

It was one of the kitchen ladies who always helped in the Sunflower House. A worried expression was plastered on the kitchen lady's face when she saw that Yuki was down on the floor and was crying really hard. She hurried to her side and helped Yuki got up from the floor.

"What happened?" The lady asked while she dusted Yuki's pants.

Yuki just shook her head and smiled at the lady. A smile that did not reach her eyes.

"You know that you can tell me, right?" The kitchen lady offered in a motherly tone.

Yuki wiped the remaining tears off her eyes and sniffed away the last of her sobs before she tried to smile once again. This time she quirked up a more cheerful smile.

"It was really nothing, Kaname-san!"

The lady seemed unconvinced but she took how Yuki was acting as an answer: _she did not want people to know about it._ The lady sighed but nonetheless gave Yuki a smile and patted her back.

"Let's get you some water, okay?"

Kaname-san took a glass from the cupboard and poured a generous amount of water in it, then she handed it to Yuki which the latter gratefully accepted. After she drank the glass empty, Yuki fastened her crumpled shirt and turned to look at the kitchen lady.

"I'm sorry for worrying you, Kaname-san," Yuki giggled quite awkwardly.

"Ishikawa-san?"

They both heard Shiharu's voice which came from just right outside the kitchen. Yuki instantly froze on the spot and the now-empty-glass slipped from her hold and fell on the floor. The glass broke into sharped and tiny pieces.

"Yuki-san!"

"I'm sorry!"

Kaname-san and Yuki exclaimed at the same time and both of them crouched down to pick up the shards of broken glass. Shiharu, who heard the two screamed, slammed the kitchen door open which startled Yuki even further and caused her to accidentally cut her finger.

With a bleeding finger, shock, and fear painted on Yuki's face, she turned her eyes towards the direction of the kitchen door. And all the life got sucked out of her body when the cause of all her anxiousness and grief was really standing there on the doorway just behind Shiharu.

"Yuki-san!" Shiharu ran towards her and inspected her cut. "It's quite deep! Does it hurt?" The girl got up and took the first-aid kit from the cabinet that hanged just above the fridge.

Yuki shook her head _no_ without taking her eyes off the man that was also frozen at where he was standing. More than the physical pain caused by the cut, it was her heart that was in most pain.

"Yuki..."

Her heart ached more when the way he uttered her name echoed throughout her system – it sounded like he was worried, relieved, sad, happy? The way he let his lips called out her name contained emotions that she had not heard and felt from him for years.

But she did not want to hear them nor feel them. Yuki wanted to run but she could not do so because her entire body had already given up on her. _Why did everything had to betray her?_

Shiharu attended to Yuki's wound.

Kaname-san swept the pieces of the broken glass.

Toru took a step inside the kitchen.

Yuki flinched. "Don't!"

Both of the ladies that were with her looked at her with questioning look.

"Just don't," Yuki's eyes looked at Toru's.

They stared at each other. _How long had it been since he looked at her straight in the eyes?_ But it was Toru who looked away first. He sighed, took a step back, and disappeared in the hallway.

Yuki snapped back to reality when she heard Shiharu's voice beside her. She turned her head and saw the worried glance that Shiharu had been giving her. But Yuki could not find the voice to speak. She looked down and saw that her cut was already covered with a band-aid.

"Thank you," Yuki bowed her head before she got up and left the kitchen.

Kaname-san and Shiharu sent her off with a worried expression on their faces but both of them felt that it was not the right time to ask what just happened.

Yuki gently slid the door of the nap room open and gently she closed it. She was careful with her every step because she did not want to wake up the little ones who were sleeping peacefully on their futons. When she reached the futon where her baby was, she knelt down on both her knees and carefully picked her baby up. Yuki laid Ruki on her arms and rhythmically rocked her back and forth while she hummed her a lullaby.

Ruki stirred but did not wake up, instead, she nuzzled on her mama's arms and continued on sleeping very soundly. Yuki smiled as she felt the warmth of Ruki on her hands. She brought Ruki closer to her and gave her baby a small kiss on the forehead.

"What now?" Yuki tried asking her baby.

Ruki's eyebrows furrowed, her tiny hands jolted and rubbed her small face through her mittens, after her cute attempts to scratch her own face the baby started to smile.

Ruki's actions warmed Yuki's heart. She was right. _Ruki only needed her, not Toru._

* * *

 **HELLO! I am back with another chapter of CD &EN (hehehe)~ Please don't forget to leave a comment or opinion! Or even suggestion, like "UHM WHAT IF YOU MAKE YANAGI YUKI'S CURRENT BF OR SOMETHING" kind of suggestions HAHAHA~ Anywaaaaay, please please please forgive me for writing short chapters everytime (I'm not really into long chapters huhuhu) and for posting in long intervals (My head's full of Orange fanfic rn)! Again! Don't forget to comment if you enjoyed it or if ya want to kill me already lol~**

 **In the next chapter: A flashback on the night when Yuki left Toru's house and the days when she was pregnant with Ruki!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Horimiya nor Love so Life... I WANT TO BUT I DONT**


	4. Snow Cookies

Yuki has had enough. It was freezing cold and it just started snowing, her hands – whole body, in fact – were shaking and she no longer felt the tips of her fingers. She sighed in both annoyance and frustration when her suitcase kept on falling on the ground no matter how many times she leaned it against the fence of the house which she, herself, was leaning against. She was already tired from almost three hours of walking without a particular destination in mind, so when her suitcase fell again for the nth time she did not care anymore and left it on the ground.

Yuki started to sob. She was exhausted. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. She just leaned against someone else's fence and cried there silently, a lot of thoughts ran inside her mind especially the question of where would she go.

At first, she thought of going to the Miyamuras. They lived quite close and she knew that they would welcome her with open arms. But she reconsidered because she did not want them to get any more involved in her problem with Toru. Yuki did not want to cause a rift between the relationship of Kyouko and Izumi just because they would choose to side with their best friends. They were out of the equation.

After that Yuki then thought of going to Remi and Sengoku's. But she was suddenly slapped with the reality that between her and Sakura the couple would favor the latter. Who was she, Yuki, in their life in the first place? She was just someone who took away the first love of their best friend. So, again, out of the equation.

Her last option was to go to her sister's place in Tokyo. Yuki already took her phone from her bag and was about to dial her sister when she remembered the phone call she had with her sister the other day. Her big sister was so frantic, she kept on asking what flavor of cake would be the best, or what appetizer should she choose, or the main course, she thought otherwise. Yuki did not want to add to the stress and anxiousness her sister was feeling. Yuki sighed. She wanted her sister to focus on her soon-to-be wedding with Yanagi. So, no to Tokyo.

"Have a happy marriage, Sister…" Yuki whispered to herself as she put her phone inside her pocket.

Yuki crouched down next to her suitcase that was on the ground. She furiously wiped the tears that streamed down her face, it was getting annoying how much she cried that night. She slapped her face to remind herself that it was only her now, she only had herself to depend on for her and her child's future.

The scene at the train station and in front of the hotel replayed in her mind. _Toru…_ _and Sakura…_ Tears would not stop from spilling from her eyes, her sobbing was turning to wailing. She did not want to bother the neighborhood but she could not stop herself from feeling depress. There was a voice inside her head that told her to just swallow her pride and to go home, but the sensible side of her told her that she no longer had a place in that house, let alone in Toru's heart.

"Excuse me?"

Yuki wiped the tears from her face and hurriedly stood up from her crouched position, almost lost her balance but was saved by the fence. "Sorry, I was just resting!" She bowed her head in apology without looking at the person who, in her guess, was the owner of the house.

The said person opened the gate and without hesitation touched Yuki's frozen face. "You're freezing cold! Come inside! And let us get you warmed up!"

* * *

Yuki jolted awake when she heard the cries of her daughter from the crib she was sleeping at. Yuki hurriedly went over to where Ruki was and gently picked her up from the crib, she rocked her back and forth in order to stop her from crying, she did not want to wake up the people who were already deep in their slumber at two in the morning.

It had been four months since she gave birth. And it was nearing a year since she was let in the Sunflower Home by the director who found her almost freezing to death in front of the building. Yuki was so grateful that the people in the orphanage welcomed her warmly without asking any questions about her nor the father of the then unborn Ruki. She felt so grateful that they were there when she was struggling with her pregnancy with her daughter.

* * *

Yuki remembered the first time she bled during her pregnancy; that was the time when the doctor told her that she was at high risk of having a miscarriage. She did not know what to do at that time. The doctor told her that she needed to stop strenuous activity and also needed to drink vitamins to help her in her pregnancy; that would have been fine if she had the luxury to stop working and still be able to put a food inside her mouth, but she did not have that luxury! She could not afford to not work because where would she get the money to buy food and vitamins? Yuki thought that if she stopped working the orphanage might throw her out!

But there were still people who have golden hearts. When the director of Sunflower Home learned of her condition, Yuki was told to stop working until she had given birth.

"You don't have to worry about paying us," the director smiled warmly as she pulled the blanket up to Yuki's shoulder, who was lying in bed at that time. "What you need to worry about is your health. We would be happy if you would give birth to a healthy baby!"

When Ruki finally stopped crying, Yuki put her back down on the cribs, gently covering her body with her blanket. She touched the palm of her baby's hand and softly giggled when Ruki wrapped her tiny hand around her finger. Yuki leaned over and placed a small kiss on her daughter's forehead.

"I hope that one day when you grow up, you find someone who will treasure you. Treasure you more than I ever would," Yuki smiled warmly, "Love you more than I ever would. Only then would I feel at ease. I hope that you, my angel, will not experience being left alone by the man who will tell you that he loves you."

* * *

It had been over a year since Ruki was born and Yuki could not help but smile as she stared at her baby's peacefully sleeping face. Yuki looked over her shoulder when she heard little footsteps behind her. She saw that it was a blond-haired little boy.

"How old is she?"

Yuki ruffled his hair. "She's turning one. How about you, Aoi?"

* * *

 ** _Hello~ I am back with another chapter of Cookies, Dumplings, and Everything Nice! This chapter was just a filler, a chapter that tells us what happened to Yuki the night after she learned of Toru's 'adultery' and the night she left their house!_**

 ** _If anyone's wondering, the first part is the night after the incident, the second part is four months after she gave birth, the third one is a recollection of the time she almost lost Ruki due to miscarriage, and then back to the four months setting, and last part was the first chapter of the fanfic! Yay!_**

 ** _Well, I wanted to write more but I had so little time! But I promise, I'll update 2-3months from now! Please be patient with me? Love you guys lots! O and omygode! The chapter of Horimiya when THIS SHIP IS FINALLY CANON! cries_**

 ** _This has been Psychoticauthor! signing out (for now)_**


	5. Snow Cookies II

**Hello, this is psychoticauthor~ omg! I'm back to writing! Thank you for waiting for this chapter and I hope you'll like it! It's still the unedited version so there might be a lot of incorrect grammar, words spelled wrong, and stuff. Please, forgive me for now. I'll edit it tomorrow or the day after~ Woohoo!**

 **Please R &R. Love you guys! But I love this couple so much more hahuhuhu**

 **I do not own Horimiya nor Love so Life. *cries***

* * *

Toru's hand was trembling, he clasped them together to stop the shaking but nothing happened. He kept on thinking back to the eyes that stared at him when he was on the kitchen and his heart trembled from remembering the intensity that those eyes held. He never knew that Yuki could ever look at him that way, never did he once see her had that look back when they were together in high school nor when they were living inside the same house as a married couple. Toru clenched his hands, the trembling was already subsiding but he was still thinking about Yuki and her eyes filled with emotions he could not describe.

The door to the head mistress' office was opened gently by Shiharu who had a tray in his hands containing a glass of water and plate of snow-colored cookies. She set it down on the table in front of him before settling down herself on the couch across Toru.

"Uhm…" she was looking at everything aside from his eyes. "Are you…"

"Am I?" Toru knew what she wanted to ask. _Are you Yuki's husband? Are you Ruki's father?_

"Uhm… what's your relationship with Yuki-san?" She was now staring at the space that separated them.

He turned his attention away from Yuki and stared at the sugar coated cookies that looked like snow. "Did you make this?"

"Yuki-san baked them," Shiharu finally lifter her head and looked at him. "It tastes great! Please, have some if you like."

"She always burned them before, burned them to the point of them looking like charred charcoal."

He smile when an image of those cookies that Yuki always baked back then flashed before him.

"But now, look at these cookies," he took one and smiled fondly at it as if he was looking at something precious.

"Yuki-san always burned them before, too. But as Ruki started growing more inside of her womb she also started becoming better at cooking. She also started smiling again."

"She started smiling again? That's good."

Toru knew that he was the reason why Yuki stopped smiling, and he knew he could have done something to bring back that smile to her lips but he did not – he chose not to. A year ago, after five years of being a childless married couple, he started to feel cold about their relationship. They kept on fighting about little things; she started getting jealous of every female co-workers of his which annoyed him and would lead to further fighting.

"I met a high school friend," Toru sighed clasped his hands. "She confessed to me back then. Yuki had always been jealous of her even though we were already a couple. When we got married she was still anxious about my relationship with Sakura. Ah, Sakura's the name of that friend."

Shiharu was intently listening to his story which made Toru felt at ease. He unclasped his hands and rested them on his knees.

"Sakura never got married and that added to Yuki's anxiety. But, really, it was all my fault. I knew about her worries, I knew she was very jealous of Sakura, but I still started to hang out again with Sakura. I joined her for dinners and drinking parties, I rarely went home early to join my wife for dinner. I knew I was making Yuki more anxious and jealous but I just did not want to back down."

Toru let out an annoyed grunt when he remembered the last fight they had. He wanted to punch himself on the face for slamming the door and getting mad at her for being nosy. He knew that he was at fault but he did not want to back down. Something about their married life made was lacking; his life with Yuki for those five years started becoming dull and dragging, that was why he wanted either a way out or something that would excite him again. And, Sakura came.

"But I never slept with her. No. Never. But I knew I was technically cheating. And if given the chance back then, I would have chosen Sakura. I don't know. I was mad, mad at myself and at Yuki. I was mad at Sakura. But most of all, I hate myself for being like that."

"If you would choose Sakura-san over Yuki-san, then why are you here, Ishikawa-san?" Shiharu really wanted to know for Toru's reasons for coming. She wanted to get mad at him for saying that he would have chosen that other girl but something in her told her that it was different now.

She stared at him and repeated the question for him. "Why are you here then? You could have just let Yuki-san go on living without you and start building another life with that Sakura. Yet, you are here. And I know that it isn't a coincidence. So, what's your reason?"

Toru's reply was short and simple, "Ruki."

* * *

"Horimiya, ask your Dad to put on your socks for you!" Kyouko ordered her son while she was in the kitchen.

"Dwaddiiii!"

Kyouko giggled.

"Shooooocks powt on me!"

"Yes, yes. Daddy will put on your socks for you," Izumi lifted his son and sat him on his lap. "Hon! Have you packed Horimiya's change of clothes?"

"Not yet, hon. Can you do it for me? I'm still making sandwiches for our trip. We're already running late, we need to get on the road so we can arrive at Sunflower before evening."

"Okay! Come on, buddy. Let's pack some Spiderman clothes!"

"Yesh Dwaddi bwadi!"

* * *

"What about Ruki?" Shiharu was taken aback and her voice got louder.

"No, no! Don't get me wrong, Shiharu-san," Toru shook his head. "I just want to see her. Maybe, if Yuki would allow me, I want to hug her. And become a father for her."

"What if Yuki-san will not allow it?"

Toru turned stared at the ceiling for a few seconds, as if he was trying to imagine the talk he would have to go through. He returned his attention to the girl in front of him, took another cookie and had a bite of it.

"This is really good! Yuki have really mastered baking cookies, no?"

Shiharu nodded.

Toru let out a sigh and returned a half-bitten cookies on the plate. "I would talk to her. Convince her. If worse comes to worst, I would beg while kneeling down just for her to let me be a father to Ruki."

"It isn't that easy, Ishikawa-san. What you did to Yuki-san and to Ruki…"

"I know. But, I don't know how to make it up to her. How to make her believe in my desire to take on the responsibility of being a father."

"Do you really want to be a father? Or it's just your guilt telling you to run after what you've let go?" Shiharu's eyes were filled with questions and doubts and she did not hide them.

Toru gulped. "On that night that I went home and found that no light was on, my heart raced. I became anxious when I opened the door and I did not hear her voice. The house felt empty. It felt cold. And then I saw her letter, my keys, and the result of her check-up. Then there were burnt cookies."

"And then, what did you do?"

Toru laughed but Shiharu heard sadness instead of happiness. "I ate the cookies. It still tasted bitter just how it used to taste five or six years before, but those cookies, that night, they tasted bitter and bland at the same time."

"How can th–"

The door opened and Yuki stood there. She looked as if she did not want to be inside the same room as her (ex-) husband but she kept her ground. Shiharu got up from the couch and went besides Yuki.

"Yuki-san…"

"It's okay, Shiharu-chan. Can you leave us for a bit?" Yuki gave Shiharu a smile and walked inside the room.

Shiharu wanted to say more but she kept them to herself and closed the door behind her. She wished for the estranged couple to find a middle ground for their kid, and she hoped that they'd be able to mend their broken hearts.


	6. Bitter Past

**Annyeong! jk**

 **Hello, everyone! This is psychoticautor, still alive, I guess. I am back with a freshly made chapter of Cookies, Dumpling, and Everything Nice. I might need to reread the entire story to get back in track. However, I am posting this newly saved chapter for those who might think I've already forgotten this fic. Not yet! It's just this is kinda heavy in comparison to the others that was why I kept on pushing back in writing this.**

 **Anyway, please do enjoy! And don't forget to R &R!**

 **\**

p.s I'm still going to review this for editing mehehe

* * *

Yuki and Toru stared at each other but kept silent. The room was eerily quiet, too. The ticking of the clock, the chirping of the birds outside, the laughter of the children on the first floor, all of those noises seemed to have been turned off for only their breathing can be heard. The silence was too damn loud. They stayed like that for a long time before Toru got up to his seat and uttered his wife's name.

"Please," Yuki motioned for him to take a seat. Her eyes land at the table and she saw a plate of the cookies she baked for the children of Sunflower. "How was it?" She asked casually, as if everything was okay between them. In reality, her heart was racing and she cannot think straight. But she tried to maintain her composure; she kept on telling herself to be civil.

Toru smiled. "It tasted great! You've mastered the art of baking these, huh?"

"Thank you," she smiled and sat on the couch in front of Toru. "It was really hard at first but I learned the hard way and now I am okay with it."

Toru took a few deep breaths as if he was trying to catch his breathing. Talking to Yuki was like walking tiptoed on broken glass as if she was going to burst any time soon, and Toru was afraid of that. He did not have any idea how to react if that happened.

Toru was about to speak when Yuki spoke first. "Anyway, what are you doing here?" Her voice was shaking a bit but she did not back down.

The man in question looked away from the stares that turned into glares of the woman, whom he once loved dearly but chose to hurt, that was in front of him. He gulped. He did not know what to say. What would his answer be.

A minute passed and he was still unable to speak, just frozen on that spot. Yuki felt the tension and the anxiousness that was slowly building up inside Toru. She wanted to ease the tension from her side, maybe start being calm would do, but something inside her wanted Toru to feel more anxious, feel more tensed. She wanted Toru to feel uncomfortable because of her. _He deserved it,_ she thought.

"If you came here for nothing then I think you should leave?" She phrased it as a suggestion but she intended for him to hear it as a command. _This time, I'd be the one who would make you feel unneeded._

The man sighed as if he was about to give up; as if in letting out those heavy breathes he would be able to answer Yuki back.

When Yuki got fed up from waiting for Toru's answer, she spoke once again, "Look, both of us do not have all the time in the world to sit here waiting for you to come up with an answer. If you really cannot think of anything to say then I suggest we end this nonsensical conversation and get on with our lives?"

That was when Toru found his voice to speak, "No. Let's stay here. Let's talk."

"Then talk. I asked you something and you're there darting your eyes all over the place without even looking at me nor answering my question," Yuki commented through gritted teeth. "What made you come here, Toru?" His name tasted poison in her mouth.

"I came to meet Ruki," he looked at her straight on the eyes.

Yuki's facial expression turned grim. "Then you can now leave."

"Why?"

"I'm not letting you meet her," she was trying to sound calm but the shaking of her voice betrayed her. "You don't have the right to."

"I'm her father!" Toru exclaimed as if he was trying to win over a losing battle.

"And I'm her parent," Yuki stood up, looked down at Toru with anger and sadness reflected on her orbs. "The moment you decided to meet Sakura the day I left your house was the same day you gave up your right to anything that has got to do with our relationship."

She waited for Toru to retaliate but heard nothing from him. She took her time in looking at the man she once loved so dearly before she started to walk away. When she was about to open the door, she stopped, and took a breath.

"You know that I loved you. I gave everything to you. It was hard for me to trust anyone but I did to you. Over and over before we married, I asked you if you were sure, I told you to go after her, but you told me that you loved me and wanted to spend your life with me." She grabbed the knob but did not twist it open.

Silence fell once again and Yuki could hear her own heart beating.

She smirked at herself, at her stricken in-love past, and shook her head at disbelief. "I was excited about Ruki, was so excited to tell you. Did you not hear me that night? Did you not hear me calling out your name? Was it my fault that it took us so long to have a child? Why? How did you fell out of love from us? Toru, was it all my fault?"

Yuki looked up at the ceiling to prevent her tears from spilling but no matter how hard she tried to a drop still escaped, followed by another, then she started to sob silently. To herself. Just like always.

Toru wanted to answer her questions, he also wanted to get up from the couch and console her, but he could not bring himself to get up and do so. Nor could think of any answers to her claims.

"It was so hard for me, to start again from scratch that time. I nearly lost her, too. When I gave birth I told myself that I won't let anyone, even you, take her away from me."

Silence.

"So, please, Toru, don't do anything that would ruin my life. Again."

Yuki finally opened the door and stepped herself out of that room leaving a baffled Toru inside.


	7. Bittersweet Reconciliation

**Hi~** This is psychotichauthor! I am back from my long hiatus and finally continuing this story. To all those people who keeps on reading this fic, thank you! Thank you for being patient with me even though I rarely, and by rarely just twice or thrice a year, update this fic. Being away from this story for so long resulted to some inconsistencies, please, if you find any, tell me so that I can correct them.

I will edit the entire fic if I finish this. I am not sure if I'll end it on two chapters or will continue, but my focus is to make sure that Ruki will not get hurt from anything that I will write. My precious baby.

Anyway, please enjoy this another chapter of CDEN, and do not forget to leave a review! *wink*

* * *

The room was silent once again when Yuki slammed the door closed leaving a baffled Toru on his seat, grasping for breathe. He could not breathe especially when Yuki was throwing all the questions at him, all the pain and hatred that she has for him. He wanted to retaliate, to even answer most of her questions but his voice was caught in his throat, as if he was afraid that whatever would come out from his mouth would hurt the woman before him even more. And the last thing he wanted to do was to add more pain to whatever Yuki was already feeling.

"I'm sorry," he whispered to no one in particular but his eyes lingered on the closed door.

"I'm really sorry," a tear slipped from his eyes and all he could do was bury his face on his palm and sob away all the regrets he was feeling.

Toru only lifted his head when he heard a knock and a small voice asking if he was okay when the door opened by itself. Well, not really by itself because Akane and Aoi were behind the door and were peeping inside.

"Come in," he got up from the couch and went near the twins. "Do you need me for something?" He crouched in front of the two.

The twins did not speak and only looked at his blood-shot eyes. He was about to speak again when Aoi kicked his knee, quite painfully.

He hissed. "Aoi, what did you do that for?" He asked while rubbing the part where he got kicked.

"You made Yuki-tan cry!" The little boy kicked his other knee. Just when Toru thought that he was already satisfied kicking both of his knees, Aoi started firing him consecutive hits which made him fall on his butt.

"Aoi!" Akane pulled her twin brother which made the twins stumbled on their backs. "Stop hitting other people!"

"But he made Yuki-tan cry!" Aoi screamed at his sister's face which scared the little girl causing her to start crying.

"But… but… but…" Akane tried to talk in between her sobs but she could only form incoherent words.

Seeing his sister wailing in front of him made Aoi regret what he had done, "I'm sorry," he held Akane's hand and tried to wipe the tears from her face. "I didn't mean to make you cry," he pouted.

Akane held Aoi's hand too and smiled form ears to ears, "I'm sorry, too." She even gave her twin a kiss on the cheek.

It warmed Toru's heart looking at the twins in front of him; he questioned himself why was it so hard for him to actually utter his sorry to Yuki. _Why?_ Was it because he hurt her to the point of pushing her away? Or was it because he knew that she would not believe him even if he tried to explain himself? Or was it because she did not love him anymore and that pained him the most?

"I'm sorry, too."

Toru felt a tug on his sleeves and saw that Aoi was looking on something interesting on the floor while saying his apology to him. He smiled, _how cute._ He ruffled the little boy's hair and assured him that it was fine so he need not to worry.

"But you still made her cry," the little boy still insisted and pinched his elbow. "Say sorry to her," he looked Toru in the eyes and instructed the older one with determination.

Toru chuckled and ruffled Aoi's hair even more. He looked at the hallway and back to the twins, "I will. Thank you."

* * *

"Why are you packing up, Yuki-san?" Shiharu was frantic when she saw Yuki putting clothes inside a duffle bag. "Don't tell me this is because of Ishikawa-san?"

"Yeah," she answered as honest as possible not looking at Shiharu.

The girl stopped her from putting Ruki's clothes mid-way and held them tightly. She searched for Yuki's eyes and when they met she saw that they were red from crying. "What happened?" She sounded worried and concerned.

"Nothing," Yuki smiled weakly. "It's just that…" she sighed. "I'm tired of waiting for his answers. Apologies."

"What… happened..."

"I asked him things, he did not answer."

"Did you give him the chance?"

Yuki glared at Shiharu but softened her eyes when she saw the girl flinched from her glare. "Did he give me the chance before? To fight for what we had?"

Shiharu fell silent, she did not know how to console Yuki not when she, herself, have a man as understanding as Matsunaga. However, she did not want to see Yuki hurting so much, she tightened her hold of her hand and squeezed it, giving her the courage and encouragement she needed that moment.

"You know, I heard from Ishikawa-san that he really wants to be a father to Ruki," she smiled.

"And –"

"Yuki-san, I know that I'm not in the position to say this, and maybe you will hate me. But, I know how it feels growing up without having my parents beside me. No matter how much love I received from the orphanage I cannot help feeling that there will always be this empty space in my heart and life that can only be filled by feeling the presence and love of my parents."

Shiharu smiled at Yuki. "Why don't you try giving him the chance to fill that budding void inside Ruki. Just for Ruki?"

Yuki averted her eyes and looked at the baby beside her, "He'll only leave her."

"What if he does not?"

"What if he does?"

"You are here beside Ruki. If he leaves, I know you'll make sure that whatever he leaves will be filled by your love and support and stuff," she squeezed Yuki's hands tighter. "We are here," she beamed. "Just give him this chance to prove his self. Don't be the one who would cause the emptiness in Ruki's life?"

Yuki shook her head and turned to Shiharu with a smile, "You're always positive, huh? I think that is why Matsunaga-san loves you dearly."

Shiharu blushed and was about to say something when they heard a knock and the opening of the door. When they both turned to look at who it was they saw Ishikawa Toru standing on the doorway.

"Shiharu-san, may I talk to Yuki?" His voice was so soft as if not wanting to wake up the sleeping Ruki.

Shiharu looked at Yuki for permission to leave them both alone; when Yuki nodded her head she left her one last squeeze and a smile. "You'll be alright," she whispered and hurriedly left the room, locking the door in the process.

Yuki stood up and looked at Toru straight on, "What do you need?"

"I'm sorry," he said in a firm voice.

"For?"

"Always making you cry," he walked closer to her and stopped when their shoulders were almost touching. He was standing beside her and looking down on his daughter. He squatted to take a look closer. "For making you go through a lot," he reached for the cheeks of his Ruki, he could not contain his happiness when Ruki smiled from the touch of his finger.

"I hate you," Yuki spout each words like a poison in her mouth while keeping her eyes glued to the empty space just behind the door.

"I know," he said with a sigh. "And I know it would take a long time for you to forgive me," his heart squeezed when Ruki reached for his finger and held it inside her tiny hand.

"I will never forgive you," she said with finality.

"That hurts," he grimaced, realizing how much hate she put in each of those words. "But I deserve that," he laughed bitterly.

"You deserve all the painful things in this world, Toru."

"I know."

"You also deserve not seeing Ruki," she finally turned around and looked down on the man beside her – the man who countless of times made her feel that she was never enough.

"I know," he smiled bitterly.

"But Ruki does not deserve to grow up not knowing you, not feeling your love or presence. She does not deserve to wake up every morning asking what happened between her mother and father," Yuki tried to hold back the tears building and tried to control the quivering of her voice.

"Do you mean – "

"I mean, I will allow you to see Ruki. I won't take your right away," she explained still looking down. "But, once you try to leave her, it's over."

Toru does not know how to react he could only cry from so much happiness, his heart was swelling because of what Yuki just said.

"Thank you – "

"Two conditions," she cut him off. "One, you'll only see her from Saturdays to Sundays, I need to be there while she is still a baby. Second, once you forget about visiting her during weekends without informing me before hand, this agreement will stop."

He wanted to retaliate and protest, to be honest, it was really unfair on his part. He lived almost three hours away from where they were, and that would take almost six hours of being with his daughter, but Toru knew that he needed to gulp that all down.

"Okay," he agreed, eyes still fixed on Ruki's sleeping face. "Anything for my daughter," he smiled.


End file.
